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Thu, Oct. 17

Around the Bluhmin' Town: Around the Bluhmin’ Town: One small step for fashion . . . one giant leap for marriage

Judy Bluhm

Judy Bluhm

I bought my husband, Doug, a pair of yellow shorts. Who knew that color was so important? I was walking through a store and was picking him up a pair of his usual (khaki) shorts when this pale, yellow color caught my eye.

So I took my purchases home, and excitedly showed Doug his new pants. Puzzled, he asked, “Who are those for?” When I just stared back at him, he laughed and said, “Who the heck wears yellow shorts?” I told him I see many men wearing yellow shorts (a small lie) and that he looks great in yellow (truth).

When he asked me where I would be seeing men in lemonade colored shorts, I just said “many places” and he laughed some more. What’s so funny Doug?

You see, we women are not afraid to try on something new. Colors do not make us quickly judge a garment. Unless it is not in our color wheel, but that is another story. Trying to understand why Doug would not even consider such a nice, gentle color, I did some research. I asked my teenage grandson if he would wear yellow shorts.

“Never,” he said matter-of-factly. When I called another grandson and asked him what he thought of yellow shorts, he said, “Grandma, if you buy them for me, I will donate them to the Goodwill.”

What is wrong with them?

A builder I work with said that he has a retired buddy who wears yellow shorts, but that is only on the golf course. Then he went on to say that “a woman shouldn’t try and change a man after 30-plus years.” Yikes. We are talking about a pair of shorts, not altering one’s personality. My girlfriend claims that “many men are afraid of color, otherwise their clothes would not all look the same.”

My colleague says that his ex-wife bought him a pink polo shirt once, and he knew “it was the end of the marriage.”

He went on to say that they were having problems, but he realized when she knew so little about him, that she could buy him a “hideous pink shirt,” it was pretty much a statement about how far apart they had grown.

Oh please, I am not one to poke fun at marital discourse, but a pink shirt leading to divorce?

OK, so I ended up returning one pair of yellow shorts and the cashier asked, “why?” When I told her that my husband is stuck in a fashion rut about as deep as the Grand Canyon, we both had a good laugh. But as I was walking out of the store, I did pause in front of a display of men’s lavender polo shirts.

They were beautiful. For a moment, I stopped to look for Doug’s size. And then I quickly turned around and walked away.

Dear Readers, it was one small step for fashion. . . one giant leap for our marriage.

Judy Bluhm is a writer and a local realtor. Have a story or a comment? Email Judy at judy@judybluhm.com.

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